I’m sure that there was a time in your life when you have offended someone and you didn’t really mean it. Your emotions heighten, you feel some extent of remorse, you soften up and then the hardest words come out of your mouth. “I’m sorry.” The offended person turns to look at you with tear-filled eyes and tells you “I don’t believe it.” What do you do then?
This entry has been inspired by Gary Chapman’s book “Things I wish I’d known before we Got Married”
When you’re out of Words
Sometimes “I’m sorry” doesn’t cut it and I’m sure you’ve had your shares of when that happens. There are several reasons behind why some people don’t accept your apology. But to sum it all up, it’s mostly because you have a different Apology Language. It is something to help you be sincere to the person you’re apologizing to. You can be REALLY sincere but the other person will not see it that way. These apology languages helps you to reach out your sincerity to the person you’re apologizing to.
A Form of Dialect?
You might not know it but there are different means to communicate love to a person. I’m sure you’ve heard of The Five Love Languages. A study by Dr. Gary Chapman also suggests that people also have different means to communicate an apology to a person.
1. Expressing Regret
This apology language expresses itself in such a way that the person you offended should know how much you understand your offense. This apology language is an emotional one and you should express to the person you offended how much you regret your actions that hurt him/her.
Sometimes people want to know that you understand the extent of his/her pain and regret inflicting it – in order for them to more easily accept your apology. Expressing regret usually starts with the words “I’m sorry” and then it should go on to explain to the offended person how you think you’ve offended him/her.
If this is the apology language of the person you’ve hurt, what that person wants you to know is “Do you know how deeply you’ve hurt me?” Any apology that falls short of this will not make the cut.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Five Effective Ways to Say "I'm Sorry"
via h3sean.com
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