Life tends to throw us rolls of punches in the form of heavy work, pressure, problems, conflicts and arguments. Because of this, positive psychology teaches us to focus our energies on the good things and be happy.
“The truth is, whenever tasks need to be accomplished, there is the temptation to make the task you are doing, more important than the people for whom you are doing the task.” -Tom Holladay
Special thanks to Tom Holladay for his book The Relationship Principles of Jesus.
Not to downplay this type of ‘happy’ thinking, but personally, I found this mindset temporarily relieving but emotionally stifling.
For example when Adam focuses on work, does over time and skips meals because he feels fulfilled and rewarded for it and at the same time evades his wife, Susan’s sermons. There is something wrong. And then Adam defends, “I’m working hard to provide for you and to pay the bills”.
I encourage you today to think of what the most important thing is for you. And why do you do it? If the reason why you do, involves another person, then I urge you to think about this: Does that person appreciate it? If on the other hand, it only involves you, “Is it worth-it?”
If not, then I want to share with you what I learned today.
1. Build Relationships.
Before we get caught up working hard in doing things for someone we love/value, first get busy with building your relationship with him/her.
Whether you are a parent who wants to make up for lost time with your child, or a teenager wanting to make amends with your parents or a business owner who wants to try again, build relationships first.
The problem is, many times we forget the more important things because the lesser important things can also be a source of happiness / fulfillment. In Adam’s case, this is why he spent more hours at work while Susan waited and felt unloved. He failed to see the bigger picture of what Susan had offered, can offer, and will offer compared to work.
If we just continue to focus on what makes us happy (work. sports, hobby) because of its temporary gain, we inevitably sacrifice the more valuable blessing given us: relationships.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Knowing What to Prioritize: The Reason Behind your Priorities
via h3sean.com
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